top of page

A Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich


A peanut butter and jelly sandwich sits on the table.

Is it good? Is it bad? Is it valuable? Is it trash?

The answer to these questions lies not in the sandwich itself, but in the perception of whoever is deciding the value of that sandwich.

My dad worked long hours when he was young, having to pack a lunch each day. In his lunch was a sandwich. Years and years of sandwiches. When he got older, he hated sandwiches. At that time, he would have said the sandwich was trash.

There was a time in my life where money was scarce. I had three kiddos and was trying to start a new business and a new life. I wasn’t always sure how much money there would be for food. At that time, that peanut butter and jelly sandwich was good, really good.

What about the kid who is deathly allergic to peanuts?

What about the person who is extremely gluten intolerant?

What about the person who is starving to death?

It is the same sandwich. The meaning of the sandwich changes depending on your life experiences; on your perception. Your own meaning of the sandwich changes over your lifetime as you have new experiences, meet new people, read new books, travel and learn from other people’s experiences.

A few years back there was a particularly heated election taking place. I knew people on the extreme conservative and I knew people on the extreme liberal. People were adamantly convinced that they were right in their opinion, so much so that they were willing to insult, to sever relationships, to demean and to hate. I was sick in the belly much of the time as the battle for right-ness waged.

But here is the thing. They were all right.

It was never about the peanut butter and jelly sandwich. That remained the same. It was about their perception. How they view the world is dependent on their experiences, their upbringing, their geography, their beliefs and a million other factors. No two people view the world the same. No two people view the sandwich the same. But it is the exact same sandwich.

I just hung the above picture of a sandwich in my office. The next time I find myself frustrated with someone else’s differing opinion, rant, passion, or viewpoint, I’m going to look at that sandwich and remember – they are right. I do not have to agree with them or share their viewpoint, but I do need to have some compassion and understanding.

I am also going to remember that I am right. I get my own perception of the sandwich. I will not attach too strongly to it however, because I will guarantee you if I am living life with an open heart and an open mind, that perception will change.

But it will always remain the Exact. Same. Sandwich.

bottom of page